As red-robed Cardinals packed into the Sistine Chapel, I tossed my hat into the ring in a last minute, ill-fated run for "Pope."
My Papal campaign was conducted solely on Facebook, a billion-follower entity allegedly equal in size to the entire Catholic Church.
My campaign slogan? "Man, I CAN...fix the Vatican" — "Power to the Papal" just did not work. Sadly, and like many of my fellow Catholics on a Sunday morning, that FB entourage was out to brunch. As the selected Cardinal turned into a Pope, I turned into a bar.
Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio's election caused incredible parallels 'twixt me and him to emerge, however.
• "Francis" is the name of my very first comic strip character — and my dad's middle name.
• Very familiar with "Assisi," I've often been called one myself.
• Pope Francis is a "champion of the poor", and I AM poor — a great fit!
Gazing at a mural someone painted on the chapel's ceiling, a "vision" came to mind. I there and thenceforth knew what had to be done.
As his number one priority, I fervently beseech Pope Francis to purify the entire Catholic Church, and I know a GREAT place to start.
At the source.
After all, when priests gaze upwards toward Heaven during services in that mother of all Catholic chapels, we can just guess as to what they're REALLY looking at.
And while I strive for quality artwork on Iudexonline.com, (therefore limiting it to my own) I have made a rare exception in this case by posting someone else's. With a little more practice, that painter may become great someday — once he gets his mind out of the gutter.
The solution? Put some pants on this guy, for God's sake...!
Let's Put 'Weeping Santa at Sandy Hook' On A Postage Stamp!
Fiscal Cliff Tap Dance
We're turning into a nation of Mr. Beans!
We Americans just ain't what we used to be!
• We CAN'T afford houses.
• We CAN'T afford healthcare.
• We CAN'T afford not to have healthcare.
• We CAN'T get jobs.
• We CAN'T spell.
• We CAN'T get enough home security.
• We CAN'T post signs on businesses without reams of approvals.
• We CAN'T get Congress to work.
• We CAN'T find effective leadership.
• We CAN'T launch astronauts into space.
• We CAN'T seem to come together as a nation.
These are all things we used to be able to say "we CAN do."
Send us more "we can'ts."
Here's a GREAT Way to Stimulate the Economy: Make Wall Street Pay Us Back
Those Wall Street hooligans who cost millions of middle class homeowners half their nest egg owe those homeowners, and more than just an "oops." WE think a massive one time payout by all giant firms involved to all those millions of robbed people just might re-stimulate the economy.
How 'bout it?
STATEMENT: There is no "political agenda" at iudexonline. We are neither pro nor anti-Obama, Bush, Democrat or Republican. We stand for logic and sanity, two commodities in seemingly short supply these days.
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