1-800-Flowers Discount

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Iudexonline.com — IUDEX (Pronounced "YOU-DEX") Latin for "Judge"
Featuring News Satire and Political Cartoons By former CRACKED Publisher Dick Kulpa

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First Thing I'd do As Pope?

As red-robed Cardinals packed into the Sistine Chapel, I tossed my hat into the ring in a last minute, ill-fated run for "Pope."

My Papal campaign was conducted solely on Facebook, a billion-follower entity allegedly equal in size to the entire Catholic Church.
My campaign slogan? "Man, I CAN...fix the Vatican" — "Power to the Papal" just did not work. Sadly, and like many of my fellow Catholics on a Sunday morning, that FB entourage was out to brunch. As the selected Cardinal turned into a Pope, I turned into a bar.

Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio's election caused incredible parallels 'twixt me and him to emerge, however.
• "Francis" is the name of my very first comic strip character — and my dad's middle name.
• Very familiar with "Assisi," I've often been called one myself.
• Pope Francis is a "champion of the poor", and I AM poor — a great fit!

Gazing at a mural someone painted on the chapel's ceiling, a "vision" came to mind. I there and thenceforth knew what had to be done.
As his number one priority, I fervently beseech Pope Francis to purify the entire Catholic Church, and I know a GREAT place to start.
At the source.
After all, when priests gaze upwards toward Heaven during services in that mother of all Catholic chapels, we can just guess as to what they're REALLY looking at.

And while I strive for quality artwork on Iudexonline.com, (therefore limiting it to my own) I have made a rare exception in this case by posting someone else's. With a little more practice, that painter may become great someday — once he gets his mind out of the gutter.

The solution? Put some pants on this guy, for God's sake...!

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Let's Put 'Weeping Santa at Sandy Hook' On A Postage Stamp!

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Wordpress: History Of Dick Kulpa's Political Art
...dating all the way back to his high school newspaper days in 1969-1971
Part 1: Birth of a Political Cartoonist
Part 2: Dick Kulpa Runs for Mayor
Part 3: Ald. Kulpa VS the Cops
Part 4: Rise of ALDER-MAN
Part 5: Dick Kulpa's Greatest Cartoon

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Kick Congress Off a Cliff

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Fiscal Cliff Tap Dance

I've always sworn I'd never do a "puppeteer/marionette" theme...but it fit so well!

 

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Fitting Punishment for
Fame-Hungry Mass Shooters

You know the script — the "suspect," now-VIP James Holmes gets months and perhaps years of free room and board as he revels in the aftermath of a despicable, heinous crime. Book deals, TV shows, maybe even a movie emerge as vultures proceed to milk this for all it's worth.
Let's come up with a way to send a message to any future fame-challenged bozos seeking thrills at horrendous expense. Legislation banning any profiteering — by any source — over these artificial, man-crafted disasters might be in order.
(Click on image for larger view)

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Feature Column: LEFT JAB - RIGHT HOOK: Uncle Chuckie Says "Send Women Back Into the Kitchen!" IUDEX says "Legalize polygamy and put that second wife to work!"

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We're turning into a nation of Mr. Beans!

We've Become a Country of . . .
'Ameri-CAN'Ts'

We Americans just ain't what we used to be!
To wit:
• We CAN'T afford houses.
• We CAN'T afford healthcare.
• We CAN'T afford not to have healthcare.
• We CAN'T get jobs.
• We CAN'T spell.
• We CAN'T get enough home security.
• We CAN'T post signs on businesses without reams of approvals.
• We CAN'T get Congress to work.
• We CAN'T find effective leadership.
• We CAN'T launch astronauts into space.
• We CAN'T seem to come together as a nation.

These are all things we used to be able to say "we CAN do."
Send us more "we can'ts."

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Here's a GREAT Way to Stimulate the Economy: Make Wall Street Pay Us Back

Those Wall Street hooligans who cost millions of middle class homeowners half their nest egg owe those homeowners, and more than just an "oops." WE think a massive one time payout by all giant firms involved to all those millions of robbed people just might re-stimulate the economy.

How 'bout it?

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Kulpa Cartoons come in all sizes!
THIS one appeared on a billboard

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STATEMENT: There is no "political agenda" at iudexonline. We are neither pro nor anti-Obama, Bush, Democrat or Republican. We stand for logic and sanity, two commodities in seemingly short supply these days.

ABOUT DICK KULPA:

From school newspapers to weeklies, from dailies to national tabloids - and from staff work to syndication, Dick Kulpa has worn all the hats. In fact, Kulpa is one of but a handful of journalists to appear in both the national tabloids and mainstream dailies simultaneously -- from Weekly World News to the New York Daily News, Orange County Register, Hong Kong Standard, and more! A career cartoonist, Kulpa's earliest days saw him functioning as staff editorial cartoonist for the Loves Park, Illinois Post while simultaneously holding elective office - and this went on for ten years!

During his unusual career, Kulpa's comic strip work has been syndicated by the LA Times Syndicate and Tribune Media Services, Inc., and at one point appeared in the Moscow, Russia licensed variant of Weekly World News, (among others.)

Needless to say, Kulpa has acquired a unique, non-partison perspective.

Dick Kulpa on Wikipedia

Editor's Note: Indian, Philippino and Chinese scribes are not utilized nor outsourced to by IUDEXonline, which is 100% American-produced. Typoes and various other grammatically-incorrect sentences occasionally posted on IUDEXonline are generally intentional, so as to reflect current trends prevalent among major news organization websites accessed via cellphone.

Iudexonline and all stories, cartoons and photos ©2013 Dick Kulpa. All Rights Reserved.

 

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