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Iudexonline.com — IUDEX (Pronounced "YOU-DEX") Latin for "Judge"
Town Terrorizes Giant Lobster!
BOYNTON BEACH, FL — A young boy fishing in a town canal got more than he bargained for when a 15-foot lobster suddenly emerged from the water — nearly snagging the youth with its massive claws!In a declaration of "paramount emergency" from as high up as the White House,
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Washington has dispatched teams of experts to the unrevealed location in an effort to capture the humongous creature alive.
Simultaneously, marauding groups of townsfolk are dragging the canal and searching nearby areas for the creature. "We need to find this thing before some willy-nilly government stooge does," said one local.
While there are no reports of any other attacks, injuries or fatalies related to the creature, "nobody's really skeert that it's gonna do nothin'," said one local. "It ain't uncommon for sharks and other salt water fish to swim up the canal from the inlet," he added.
It appears the feds are also shipping a giant freezer to the location. When informed of that development, a local blurted "WHY do ya THINK they're after this critter — for the same damned reason we are! The government ain't moved this fast even during Hurricane Katrina -- that's one heap big dinner!"
"But we're gonna git it first — our block party's already planned and the water's already boilin'!"
UPDATE: Officials intensified their search after the passing of Senator Ted Kennedy, apparently in an effort to provide for "one helluva funeral banquet", says an insider.
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